Once upon a time there was a turtle named Edward.
Edward was quite fast for a turtle. Actually, Edward was quite fast regardless of what species he was; he won the annual Spring Race of Hunch-Back Farm for three consecutive years.
Edward had a best friend, Arnold, who was an Owl. Edward and Arnold were best friends ever since they were three years old. They hatched in the same nest together and their parents made them play with each-other much.
One day, Edward was taking a stroll down Hunch-Back St. (the main street in Hunch-Back ville - it spanned twelve blocks!) and he found something extraordinary.
He saw a rock.
At first, it just seemed like any old rock that you see on the grounds of Hunch--Back st. But after further investigation, there was no mistaking that this rock was indeed special. The rock that Edward had seen was a rock that could talk.
"Hello" said the rock that could talk.
"Hello to you aswell, sir." Edward responded.
"Have you had your rice pudding today? There aren't as many grass seeds this time around as there are in the puddles of unicorn make-up. I do say, sir, that your breath is very silky; like a raccoon's feathers."
"How kind of you. But I must say to you that your claws are rather diminutive for your fiersome stature. You should take some time to climb the grapevine. It is very fruitful for gossip harvesting." said Edward, quite happily.
"The sun is almost blushing. It is nearly time for your medications." the rock that could talk said, hurriedly.
"Oh, cheese-whiz! I must get back before the bees sting the throbbing hearts of twenty iguana belts!" Edward ran, ran and ran! He ran like a magical pony on magical steroids! He must get home quickly; last time he did not get home quickly, the bees buzzed. No-body wants the bees to buzz. Especially not Edward.
But, right then and there on Hunch-Back st., Arnold bumped into Edward. "Hello there Edward!" hooted Arnold in a very owl-like tone.
"I must hurry! I must hurry! The blushing sun has no time for caterpillars and gummy worms. I must get back to the house of mine before the bees buzz!" Edward was very serious.
"Oh, but why don't we just play 'eat the food' first? 'Eat the food' is my most favourite game. It will only take one minute." Arnold assured him.
"I don't see why not.. but the bees... they will buzz, ever so buzzingly..."
So they ate the food.
"How fun." exclaimed Arnold, trying to contain his excitement.
So, now that Edward had eaten the food, he had begun to rush toward his house.
He got there just in time. The sun blushed, but it was fine - Edward was in his bed already and the alarm clock genie would never beg for twelve dollars again, even if the chihuaha next-door brought sexy back.

The end.